Edward Henry Anderson: A Small Introduction

My name is Edward Henry Anderson, and I live in Centerboro, a small, rural upstate New York town near Rome and about fifty miles east of Syracuse. I was born on October 31, 1920, and I’ve lived here all my life and will, no doubt, cash it in here, too. I graduated from Centerboro High School in 1939, served in the U.S. Army in WW II, came back home in one piece (honorable discharge), and went into the real estate business. I got into a little trouble with the law more than half a century ago, especially after a few run-ins with that damned Frederick Bean, but I won’t get into that just yet. One side (almost entirely untrue) of the story is told in Walter R. Brooks’s series of books based on real happenings in and around Centerboro many years ago. All I can say is that I bought that hotel fair and square and didn’t scare anyone out of anywhere. That signed confession mentioned in Freddy Goes Camping—it's not worth the paper it’s printed on! It was obtained from me under duress and didn’t and still doesn't mean a thing! The time I did in jail wasn’t all that bad. Sheriff Higgins was pretty enlightened for those times and actually treated me like a human being, which is more than I can say for most of the residents of Centerboro.

A little now about Centerboro, my home. It is surrounded by old farmland, not much of it worked anymore, and just to the north are the Adirondack Mountains. There’s a beautiful lake nearby, Oteseraga Lake, but the town itself is sadly in decline. Oh, sure, there are a couple of little retail operations along Main Street, but what was once a thriving downtown area is otherwise dominated by a hideous mall that was erected after a cabal of Urban Renewal cretins conspired to destroy the charming business district in the late '60s and early '70s. The residential areas are holding up pretty well, but many of the houses have been neglected and are falling into disrepair. I guess you could say that the life has been sucked right out of Centerboro thanks to the oppressive New York State taxes and the migration of the young to greener fields. Almost all the youngsters move out right after high school, and who can blame them? Not me, certainly.

Well, that’s all history, and I think I might be digressing already--something I tend to do as I approach ninety. Most of the old Centerboro families and businessmen and farmers have folded up or passed away or both, and the old timers who are left just don’t remember a lot about the old days. Or maybe they can’t which is why I am publishing this Website to go into the history of Centerboro and some of its inhabitants and to clear the air about what happened with the Martians—probably long before most of you reading this were even born. Even if you have not read the Freddy the Pig stories by Walter R. Brooks, my little site may be of great interest to you, particularly if you would like to find out THE TRUTH™ about the Martian visitation to Centerboro, New York, in the mid-1950s. There has been a lot of silence about the Martians. Almost no one in Centerboro speaks of the critters. Sometimes I believe I’m the only one who recalls the days they they were with us. Martians look a little like the Michelin Man—squat and kind of segmented. Three eyes. Feelers. Six legs, upon which they walked erect on two. They were insect-like, obviously, and kind of flimsy looking, but tough. If you ran your hand along a Martian carapace, it felt like rubbing a lobster. Their speech sounded to me like a Smith-Corona manual rattling along like crazy with a tin pail of ball bearings being whirled around and shaken in the background. Some folks claimed that they began to understand the language, but I never did to any great extent--just enough to get by.  I did learn a number of useful phrases, but I communed with the Martians mostly through telepathy, and I still do to this day. Some claimed the Martians came to study us. Could be. If they did, it wasn’t like the baloney on that old show The X-Files. The Martians walked among us, so to speak, and didn’t hide a thing. However, if they wanted to study us, that was not their main reason for coming here, which I get into later. As a matter of fact, I get into pretty much everything later. Is there any particular order in which to read through all the information here at Mr. Eha's Place? Well, I'd read the FAQs in order, but browsing around is OK, too.

Now, please don’t expect any really fancy bells and whistles on this piddling site. I'm barely able to do what you'll see here, and besides, THE TRUTH™ is more important than a bunch of totally pointless and completely distracting frills--isn’t it? I'd suggest you venture back to the Table of Contents now and begin your visit to Mr. Eha's Place in earnest!


   

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